Good Cop, Bad Cop

Today is a happy and relaxed day with our not so famous five. Tara and Amritsar are on a school trip to Hampton Court Palace and Sindy has just left with the little ones to collect them from school as their coach has just returned. More on this later. Okay, Aaliyah has been so much better behaved today and Thor has been a quiet and laid back little boy. There’s always ups and downs I know, with parenthood. Today is going well. As for Caleb, for the last few days his behaviour has altered. He seems much happier and is constantly holding his arms open to me for a hug. Not just any hug, but he wants a kiss as well. All of our children like a kiss and hug, but the kiss is usually on the forehead or cheek. Caleb on the other hand is insistent on a kiss on the mouth. It’s very sweet really. You see sadly, Caleb and I weren’t the best of friends in the past. I always tend to be ‘Bad Cop’ and John enjoys the mantle of being ‘Good Cop’ as he only gets to be with the children at the weekends and every second Thursday. With Aaliyah and Caleb in particular, they have only ever thought of me as the bad cop, so I guess our bond and love has taken a bit longer to establish itself. John used to find it impossible to be the bad cop. That has now changed and in history, I think the two little ones only remember me saying NO to ‘uppies’ all of the time. As babies I hugged and hugged them so much, but they don’t remember that far back do they! It did get quite bad when they were toddlers and I was more adamant that we picked them up less and less. John on the other hand only saw them part time and wanted them in his arms as much as possible. I get it, but there is a time that your baby becomes a toddler and with that comes more and more independence. The last nanny we had would pick them both up constantly, just to counter me saying that we should pick them up less. She was very young and a bit spiteful come to think of it. We are so much happier with Sindy, now with us for the last eighteen months. We still enjoy plenty of ‘uppies’, just not all of the time. And with John occasionally playing bad cop now, it allows me to be good cop with our two youngest some of the time. Hence, my relationship and friendship with Aaliyah and Caleb has come on in leaps and bounds of recent. We are all a lot happier.

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A Gay Dad reflecting on life in the Shires of England with my not so famous five and two rapscallion Dalmatian hounds

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