Biting My Lip

Is giving up a good idea? I have really had to mull over this one! It concerns Aaliyah, a 4 (almost 5) year old who likes to suck her fingers. Looking back at old photos, she is always doing it! Sucking her fingers that is. We didn’t use a dummy or pacifier on her as a baby or indeed her twin Caleb.

She is sat on the sofa opposite me at present, sucking away merrily. as happy as Larry, whoever he is! Since lockdown began for us personally, twelve weeks ago today, I have asked her to wear a woollen glove on her right hand. She doesn’t like to suck her left one! This must insinuate that she no longer shows signs of being ambidextrous. Oh well.

So, day in, day out, throughout these long lockdown weeks, she has been asked to wear the glove daily. And by in large, it has worked, but I do have to prompt her several times each and every day to put the glove back on! She keeps taking it off for a sly suck, thinking that I am not watching. It has become a tedious chore monitoring this. And yes, always me that has to play the ‘bad cop’ whilst John gets to only do the fun things!

Well, after 3 months today, I just said! I give up! The reality is that she still sucks her fingers in bed anyway.

Our nanny Sindy is returning on Monday so I have decided that this impossible ask (her stopping sucking her fingers) will now have to fall on her (sorry Sindy). I really have had enough! ‘Go on Aaliyah’ I said ‘go ahead and suck them, I’ve had enough of trying to help you’! So, until Monday, I will say nothing, just try to ignore it. Just bite my lip. So my question to you today is, is giving up a good idea?

I have just asked her to start washing her hands at least 10 times a day. ‘Why’ she replied! ‘Because of the spit on your fingers’ I said. She has promised to wash her hands more often. Well it’s a start I guess.

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A Gay Dad reflecting on life in the Shires of England with my not so famous five and two rapscallion Dalmatian hounds

28 thoughts on “Biting My Lip”

  1. I smiled at this; I feel like every child tries out the finger sucking game! And, funnily, enough I remember sucking on my fingers as a kid. I stopped the day I sucked them so long, the skin wrinkled . . . 🙂
    Glad you have found a place to start!

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    1. A new start casts off the old shackles for sure. Yes, I think we will turn Aaliyah’s antics more on education. That is the way forward on this! Thank you for your own memory shared Jaya. That in itself priceless. 🙂

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  2. Our middle daughter was the same when younger. We tried Tabasco but that didn’t work. We ended up going to the orthodontist (because she really lucked up her teeth) and they put a small bar behind her front teeth. The made it uncomfortable to put her hands in her mouth. That worked really well. Now she has perfectly straight teeth.
    Our son was kind of the same with the fingers in the mouth, until one day he had dirty hands and did it. That was his “Quitting Cold Turkey” moment.

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    1. That’s amazing information Josef! I thank you for that. Mind you, I don’t think we are allowed the Tabasco option here in the UK! 😀 Really appreciated. Thank you for the advice.

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  3. I don’t have any answers on this one but funnily enough my eldest does the same. That and chews on everything: pencils, baby toys, the remote control. She is left handed and very ‘lefty’ if that makes sense.. extremely creative, great technical skills with models and shapes, but seems to lack coordination sometimes and has no sense of personal space or distance. Anyway, I’m just saying, I think some kids are just like that and I’m sort of thinking they’ll just grow out of it. The finger sucking, I mean. And the pencil chewing. Not the left handedness. We love our little tactile, creative-thinking lefty! 😉

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    1. Haha Anna, very well put! It flowed so well as to read like a simple sentence with all the information in the world contained within it! You’re right, time will ultimately tell. So, I’m thinking, if I assert the hand washing but, the hygiene thing might assert something to her. We do talk about germs and viruses! I’m not quite Howard Hughes but I try to make a small stance!

      Lovely comment – thank you 🙏

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      1. Haha! Well yes, I’m the same with bacteria and just the idea of having spit on everything. It winds me up. But then I’m like: ‘Anna, pick your fricking battles, girl..!’ 🤨

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  4. When my nephew was Aaliyah’s age, he had his fingers in his mouth all day; from the time he woke up to the time he went to bed. His hands STUNK! I wanted to put Tabasco sauce in his fingers to prevent him from doing it. My mother was against it. She said it was cruel and he wouldn’t know what to do. If it’s any consolation, my nephew has turned out alright.

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    1. That is reassuring Greg. I really appreciate your comment. I as m a bit of a hygiene freak! 50 times a day I hand wash! It seems in vain as I’ve had a cold for 4 years, since our oldest started preschool! But no bad tummy’s for me! I know she will ultimately stop! Just when? 😞

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  5. Do not worry, do not fret, she will stop. My daughter had her thumb in her mouth till she was 10 and she never needed braces on her teeth.
    One day like magic, my daughter just said , “I no longer need my thumb..” lol
    She also twirled her hair and that stopped as well when she gave up on her thumb .

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    1. That is such a lovely memory to share. Thank you so much Margie. Aaliyah also twirled her hair a bit! Though she’s not responsible for her ringlets – I believe genetics has its part to okay on that score!

      Children all just up to bed, some screaming, but otherwise all is well…

      Have a lovely afternoon Margie, Jeff and Hank. 🙂

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      1. Thank you Andi.
        It was a very lovely afternoon, we all took a long hike and are quite exhausted this evening.
        We are sitting by the lake now, 🙂
        I know it’s very late there and I say good-night and wish you sweet dreams. 🙂

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  6. You know I don’t remember hpw my sister stopped. I think eventually she did it on her own, though. Nothing worse than trying to wait out a habit. Lol Poor Andi. She will stop one day.

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    1. Thank you for your thoughts JJ. I am worrying that we have to wait it out! I definitely know with her resistance the 3 month glove approach has clearly not worked! Don’t worry, we have 6 separate gloves and they are washed constantly. Lol. The battle lost, I’m gonna have to consider the overall war! But waiting it out might just last to mid teens when boys tract figuring into the equation! 😩

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      1. Oooh sounds like we are back to the drawing board on this one. If I see any new things out there, that may help I’ll let you know.

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