A Day in The Garden

Been a long enough day here in ‘The Shires’. An early morning bed invasion at 6am and toasted sourdough bread with the last of ‘Dadda’s X-Rated Xmas Jam’ (spiced pear and raisin) for brecky. Another birthday party for the children at 10.30am at a well known soft-play establishment, yet Dadda had to remain at home whilst John managed all five at Williams birthday. Woohoo for William – 6 years old today. I stayed at home to meet an old friend at 11am, Michelle Martinoli, a fab gal who is one of the best photographers I know. She kindly said she would help Dadda capture a few images of himself! Well, you know the score, it’s always me stood behind the lens, so I never get my image captured. And after today, I can happily parade myself on my diary every now and then. Mich is great – she doesn’t tolerate fools lightly, she’s a no nonsense kind of woman and I love her for just being her!

And Mich is a dog lover – her own loveable pooch Loppy, she missed very much, but Remus and Gracie did all they could to make her feel welcome.

We got a few reasonable shots, which is great as I don’t feel I photograph well – you know, looking vague, eyes closed, mouth open. I am now laughing to myself. Anyhow, http://www.michelemartinoli.com/ is the lady in question. Check her out! I remember a retrospective of ‘Pete Burns’ (you spin me round) she did a fair few years back. A great recorder of personality and expression. Mind you, I’m pretty conservative in comparison to such high camp frivolity.

The day ended for the little ones after a rather raucous bath time. Thor and Aaliyah were ballistic, Amritsar and Tara were not that much better behaved and Caleb, dear Caleb, after his wet wipe bath (remember his broken arm), he was so sweet. He actually just pounced on me and gave me a big kiss on the lips and a very affectionate hug – it really moved me as it was quite out of the blue.

A long day and an early night I think. So here’s to the beginning of another week here in ‘The Shires’ with ‘Diary of a Gay Dad’, with me Andi Webb. Thank you for reading. Nite nite all.

Roll on the weekend

Well if our robot can be left to do its job, we should have a nice vacuumed living room floor for the weekend. But I fear it is an uphill struggle. To be honest, I’m a bit rubbish at doing the cleaning. I keep a clean kitchen however. Don’t get me wrong, but having qualified as a chef many years ago, I still apply the kitchen rules, ‘if there’s time to lean – there’s time to clean’. Mind you, outside of the kitchen, said rules do not apply. Sindy our nanny helps out when she can and we have a cleaning duo Becky and Hayley who come in once a month. My time is mostly spent tidying up after our motley crew. And that in itself is a full time job. Becky and Hayley have said in the past ‘you guys keep one of the tidiest houses that we do’, but with the sheer amount of ornamentation, we fell foul to being one of the dustiest. More later – roll on the weekend!

Aaliyah’s Very Own IPad

Now off to preschool, but this morning saw an extremely happy Aaliyah at the breakfast table. She had earned that flashy, new Amazon Fire 7 tablet with a ‘fusia’ purple case. All set up with her very own profile and a pink unicorn as her motif. She was one very happy girl, with the biggest grin imprinted from cheek to cheek. Yes we had a few thwart moments over the last week, but she managed to keep a hold of herself and contain her anger when, in normal circumstances, she would have screamed the house down. Once Tara and Amritsar are back home from school, they are going to assist Aaliyah in her selection of games and educational tools to download. It’s win win really as in order to actually spend time on this new accessory, she will have to continue this streak of being good.

Thor on the other hand has been told that if he is also a good boy for one week, he will get his replacement iPad. But with Thor, seven hours would be an achievement, let alone seven days. I am looking forward to a near future when Thor is able to prove that he can be a good boy as well. Sadly it will be some time before Caleb is a contender as his ability to break stuff (his left arm included) is just too great at this point in time. We can only wait and see to what the future holds on that score!

Go Straight To Jail

Do not pass go, do not collect £200. But did they earn a ‘Get Out Of Jail Free’ card? Well, after a home made lunch of potato and watercress soup and freshly baked baguette, smothered with butter, we were not exactly starving. A trip upstairs made by myself and John out in the garden for fifteen minutes left the ‘Fruit Bowl’ unguarded. A shout upstairs from Amritsar asking for an apple for each of them was followed by a ‘Yes’ reply from myself. Ten minutes later I returned to Thor and Caleb munching down on two bananas. The floor, scattered with skins. I could make an ‘ooh ooh aah aah’ joke at this point, but I won’t! ‘You asked for apples’ I said. We only ate apples our three girls piped up. ‘And what about the boys’ I inquired. Both could not reply for mouths completely bloated with banana. I looked at the full fruit bowl, now slimmed down to just four ‘ripening’ pears – the apples and bananas were gone. ‘Who ate the bananas’ I inquired? ‘Thor and Caleb’ Tara replied (she’s very good like that). I won’t script the rest of the conversation, but the boys were told that for eating all five bananas between them (after their apples) and denying the girls of their bananas, the boys would have no dinner tonight! ‘But I’m hungry’ Thor piped up ‘I’m still hungry’ he concluded. I explained that there are always consequences in what we do and that just taking things was not allowed in our house.

However. Thor was adorable this afternoon and Caleb was less naughty than his average weekend day, so I think they earned their ‘get out of jail free’ card. Hence they enjoyed a smokey bacon spag-bol with trottole vert and a snowstorm of Parmesan cheese. All in bed now, but I’m still hearing the occasional scuttling of tiny feet on the bare wooden floors. Nite nite.

Day 6 of Being Good for Aaliyah


Last Monday Aaliyah was told that if she could be good for a week, she could have her very own iPad (Amazon Fire 7). Thus far she has indeed been a very, very good girl. A couple of grumples along the way – but we are up to a very impressive day 6. She does in fact have to keep this up until after the MayDay holiday. Tara has been ‘Binge Watching some ninety episodes of ‘Dragons’ and this has allowed Aaliyah to play with Tara’s tablet. She has worked out a lot of the games and seems to be enjoying the learning aspect. She has definitely grown up a lot in these last 6 months. If she makes it to Tuesday morning, there will be a brand new tablet with a purple case sat for her at the breakfast table. The 8 days of being good must not stop there as she will have to continue this streak of good behaviour in order to actually spend time on her brand new iPad! I think we’ve got this sussed… hehe.